


The World's Changing (and So Am I)

by CawCawAJ



Category: The Boys (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, F/M, Gen, Hughie Campbell is Secretly a Supe, Other, basically hughie has powers he didn't know about until robin died, supe!hughie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-08-14 03:43:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20185714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CawCawAJ/pseuds/CawCawAJ
Summary: It doesn't get easier for Hughie, what with the dead love of his life he keeps seeing and hearing, not that he'd ever EVER voice that aloud.If anything, it gets harder to cope after Translucent bites the dust.





	1. Cherry Bomb

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this based purely on the tv series, I've only watched the first four episodes and seen a couple of spoilers for the other four. This is an AU I came up with, I probably won't continue it after this one chapter but enjoy!!

White noise. That's all Hughie could hear at that moment as he stood frozen on the spot. He couldn't think clearly. Everything was racing _racingracing_\--

Then, time stood still. He felt like he was the only one who could move in this frozen state, all other things had been stopped. It wasn't right though. He couldn't see movement but he could hear it, faintly, underneath the white noise and the heavy breathing he was presenting his own ears with.

Hughie blinked. And suddenly, everything was back to normal. Or, at least as normal as it could be. That was when he found that he had had another episode, another moment in the day where he lost time. However, he could still see and still knew the cause of the episode.

Such a simple poster, such an innocent one. A child covered in spaghetti from trying to eat it. A few days ago, he wouldn't have even given it any thought. Now? Well, now was different. Now, Robin was dead. Now, his life as he knew it was changed.

Now? Now, he knew things about himself. Mere moments ago, he had been able to dismiss what he had been seeing as delusions, as his mournful mind playing tricks on him. Seeing Robin, the room feeling unsteady when he had to _look A-Train in the eyes as he remembered what the worthless man had said after killing her--_  
  
He hadn't even really been sorry that he ended someone's life and maybe that was why Hughie decided that, for sure, he was in it for the long term with whatever Billy Butcher had in store for these supes. That was also one of the first instances of the white noise-inducing anger and shakiness he had suffered through. Somehow, each one was worse than the last, each one took a little piece of Hughie's resolve and stuck it toward having a backbone.  
  
Unbeknownst to Hughie, it also broke away a mental barrier within his mind that had locked away something he'd never known about himself. Something that seemed impossible to Hughie, seeing as he'd lived a perfectly normal life up until now. 

But that was before the gore splatter that had once been Translucent decorated the walls. Before he'd been the reason that the supe was no longer in one piece... Without thinking of what he'd be doing, Hughie found himself licking his bottom lip as he panted. He paled the moment he felt and tasted the wet metallic, gagging and coughing nearly immediately.

This can't be happening. This can't be _happeningthiscan'tbehappeningcan'tcan'tcan't._

He stumbled, rushing to the nearest wall to brace himself so he wouldn't fall to the floor as he emptied the contents of his stomach onto the disgusting floor. He was panicking, truly this time. It wasn't just a white noise frozen-like-a-statue shock. No, no, no. This was a panic attack. Hughie couldn't catch his breath, couldn't get anything in his lungs. He couldn't _breathe._

What the fuck had he done? What had he done??

"Hughie."

Everything froze again. He felt himself stop, he couldn't even bring himself to attempt to suck breath into his dying lungs when he heard her voice.

Robin. Oh, god. No, she was there again. She was going to see what he'd done _seewhathe'ddonewhathe'dbecomeohgodno--_

"Hughieeeeee. You're overthinking things again. Getting stuck in that little noggin of yours again."

He didn't dare look, didn't dare take his eyes off of the wall he was supporting himself on. Even as he felt her presence shift to his right, he couldn't look. He couldn't face her like this. Even... Even if she wasn't real, he couldn't do it. Wouldn't.

"You were always afraid of what things COULD be, never of what they were. Always too afraid to do anything out of your comfort zone... Though, honestly, I would've recommended a lot of things that didn't include blowing up a supe. Wasn't Translucent one of your favorites, too? I mean, granted... I'm dead because of a supposed superhero, but you know."

He bit the inside of his cheek, closing his eyes. The desire to see her, to look her in the eye and know he'd never see the real Robin ever again was too much... He couldn't chance it now. He'd send himself over the edge.

Maybe he was already over the edge. He had just killed one of the most beloved superheroes and was listening to the hallucination of his dead girlfriend talking to him. And somehow, the way he killed Translucent was the worst part, maybe. He couldn't tell anymore, it all melded into one level of horror.

He wanted to go back to his normal, boring life. Not this, not... Not this world where _he just fucking killed someone._

"Hughie."

He squeezed his eyes shut further, pressing his bloodied forehead to the equally bloody wall, biting back the temptation to let the sob in his throat rip its way out.

"Hughie. Kid."

Hughie's eyes flew open.

That wasn't Robin.

"I...I..." he was shaking, he could barely say a word.

"It's alright." he felt himself being guided away, to a sink. Probably the only place in this building he'd be able to clean up at...

"You did good, Kid. You did good."

Did he?

Did he really?

He'd killed someone. He'd killed one of the Seven. He'd... How had he done it? How had he killed him?

That detonator laid some paces away, untouched. Hughie had blown up that supe bastard... And he hadn't even used the explosives. He hadn't... He'd just looked at him after he saw that damn poster again and... And Translucent had just... Exploded.

What the fuck was going on?


	2. Let's Get Some

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yessss I decided to keep this going, turn it into a multichapter work. Whoo! I plan on posting once every Friday, might not be this specific fic everytime though, I am working on my Detroit Become Vampire fic again, redoing it and making it an amazing baby on this account. I decided to write one chapter for every episode of the show, I didn't do the first episode because, I mean, the first event that happens to make Hughie's powers come out is Translucent's whole thing, so if I wrote a chapter for ep 1, it would just be the entire episode itself. 
> 
> But anyway, y'all enjoy this one, I had fun writing it

Hughie caught himself thinking about what had happened. Now that his brain was actually caught up with reality and he didn't feel like he was going to faint or vomit at the drop of a hat, he could actually stop to process the events that had occurred less than an hour ago.

  
  
Translucent had been... Blown up. Frenchie and Billy thought it was the detonator, and honestly? He thought it was safer for himself to let them think that. But he couldn't stop thinking about it. He'd blown Translucent up, hadn't he? He'd never even picked up the detonator... Right? Right. That was right, even if he wanted it to be false.

  
  
He flinched when he remembered seeing the supe being lifted in the air before he could turn invisible and, and then being nothing more than red splatter all over the place. That wasn't something he could recall having happened until just now... Had that really been what happened? Translucent being lifted into the air?

  
  
He'd done that. He'd killed someone, and he'd done it with powers he never even knew he had. That in itself made him wonder, had he ever done anything in his life without realizing it?

  
  
Supes were born that way, it was something they had since they were young... So why now? Why not sooner? That didn't make any sense, though. Every supe out there had shown signs since infancy, and he certainly wasn't listed as "super-abled" on his birth certificate.

  
  
"This it?"

  
  
Hughie found himself snapped from his thoughts. He'd forgotten he wasn't alone... Frenchie was there. He shivered slightly, trying to slip back into a stable mindset.

____________________________________________________________________  
  
  


  
Hughie had just made a huge fucking mess in his room. Seeing that little A-Train figure had set off another episode. White noise, snapping out of it and realizing he'd just fucked up his room utterly.

  
  
"Jesus Christ..." he breathed out slowly. He'd just destroyed half of his room just at the damn sight of the figure. And he hadn't even lifted a finger...

  
  
Was that a crack in the ceiling? Oh hell, yes it was. He was definitely going to be the one paying for that. One of the windows was completely smashed out, and the other was severely spider-webbed. He looked down at the shattered picture in his hand, swallowing dryly as he felt his pulse rise once more, but at the sight of him and Robin together.

  
  
At least you're not here to see this...

  
  
...But he hadn't been like this until after she was gone.

  
  
He picked the fragile photo from the broken frame, bottom lip trembling the longer he looked at it. God, he missed her so much. A sniffle ripped itself from him as tears blurred his vision and a sob broke through him.

  
  
"Hughie?"

  
  
He held his breath as he heard his father's voice in the doorway.

  
  
"Oh... Hey, Dad."

  
  
Hughie didn't really know what to say right now, he was such a mess. And he didn't want to drag his dad of all people into what was happening to him. His dad would've said something if he had known, and right now with everything going on? Better to leave his dad in the dark.

  
  
"Wh- wh-- Look at this. You--" his father gestured to the desk, the shelves he'd ripped from the wall as soon as looked at them.

  
  
Hughie thought about saying something, anything, but he just... Couldn't. Too much on his mind, too worried that if he said something, it would be the wrong thing to say.

  
  
So instead of speaking, he stood from the edge of his bed and headed to his wardrobe. He needed to pack some clothes, needed to leave, to get away for a while. Go back to...

  
  
...Go back to the people who'd probably kill him if they knew what he knew about himself. Huh. He was making interesting choices with his life now, wasn't he?

  
  
"Wait-- You going somewhere?"

  
  
"Yeah," Hughie began as he packed a bag, "For a while."

  
  
"Where?" his father asked.

  
  
"Uh.." he couldn't exactly say he was going to go hang out with some killers, couldn't say he was a killer now, too. Couldn't say a lot of things. "I don't know."

  
  
"Well," his dad started, "Now, you're scaring me, Hugh."

  
  
_Oh, if only you knew._ Hughie's brain happily supplied. He continued to pack.

  
  
"Now, I-I spoke to Dr. Feldman."

  
  
Wait. Hughie had to pause at that, "My pediatrician?"

  
  
"He's STILL your doctor, and he's given me the name of someone you can... You can talk to. Help you, you know, get back to normal."

  
  
A crack splintered itself in Hughie's mind at the words, not much different from the window or the ceiling. Anger flared within him slightly, like turning on an electric stove. He was bound to get angrier over time if his dad kept this up.

  
  
"There's no normal anymore," he said flatly. No normal for him at least. He'd blown someone up with his mind for crying out loud! He had to force himself to get back to packing his bag, had to tune his dad out.

  
  
"We've always been very open with each other, right? We've always told each other everything. Talk to me."

  
  
Another crack formed, like a windshield. "Stop it." and when his father tried to speak, he said it even louder. The crack forming in his mind was spiraling out of his control, out of his grasp now.

  
  
"I have never told you everything," he spoke harshly, not realizing that the lights in the room had started to flicker, and in the background noises of his ears, he should've noticed the faint sound of ringing slowly getting louder.

  
  
"I have never told you how much I hate sitting on that couch, staring at the TV like we're already dead." further down the rabbit hole he fell. "How much I FUCKING hate Pizza Rolls."

  
  
"Now, you love pizza rolls!" his father pointed a finger at him, and that seemed to be when Hughie truly broke down.

  
  
"When I was seven!!" the crack in the ceiling spread angrily, going down the opposite wall. The windows shuddered and the damage done to them worsened, nearly blown out. The lights in the room burst with light, before exploding entirely. Like Translucent had.

  
  
"I am NOT seven..." the final exhale of his anger released in that last sentence. The ringing white-noise in his ears disappeared... And Hughie was able to realize what he had done.

  
  
The look in his father's eyes when he finally met them. He couldn't...

  
  
He'd just... Done that. In front of him.

  
  
Hughie didn't know that his eyes had given change at the spike of his abilities, blown out to a nearly fully black.

  
  
"I... I'm sorry..." he grabbed the bag he'd been packing and leaped at the opportunity to leave. He had to get out of there, after what he had done in front of his dad. He'd never ran that fast in his life, and honestly? He thought he couldn't get out of there fast enough.

  
  
If he had looked back, he would've seen the look on his father's face, the one that spoke guilt instead of shock.

  
  
He rushed out, barely remembering to lock the door behind himself. Hughie found himself jumping damn near out of his skin when he turned around. He'd once again forgotten Frenchie had come along with him, forgotten...

  
  
Oh shit.

  
  
He stared wordlessly at Frenchie for the longest time, on the verge of mental collapse as he feared... So many things.

  
  
"I'm not like Butcher."

Hugh blinked.

  
  
"Wha--" He was stopped when Frenchie pointed behind him, at the wall around the door. It had been split... God, how much damage had Hughie done?? He thought it had just been contained to his room. Maybe he should've paid more attention...

  
  
Maybe he would've noticed the damage scaled the entire apartment if he had stopped for a moment.

  
  
Frenchie fixed him with a serious look, and Hughie barely was able to listen to him talk after that. He only picked up a part about... A hello kitty duvet?

  
  
"Your secret is safe with me. You understand that, yes?"

  
  
Hughie nodded dumbly.

  
  
_What am I doing?_

**Author's Note:**

> Insta: _ajcunning_


End file.
